Ordered a gourmet burger, got a sad patty. My disappointment is immeasurable.

Ordered a gourmet burger, got a sad patty on a soggy bun. The audacity.

Ordered a gourmet burger. Got a sad patty on a bun that looks like it lost a fight.

Attempted a soufflé. Now my kitchen looks like a science experiment gone wrong. Send fire extinguisher.

Attempted to make a 'simple' cake. It now resembles a burnt offering to the kitchen gods.

Attempted to bake a cake. It now resembles a burnt frisbee. Nailed it.

Attempted to bake a cake. It now resembles a deflated alien spaceship. Send help & ice cream.