My alarm clock on Monday morning vs. my soul. It's a battle.

My brain on Monday morning: buffering... buffering... still buffering. Send coffee.

Just spent 3 hours trying to fold a fitted sheet. Adulting is a scam.

My phone autocorrected 'meeting' to 'meating'. Boss thinks I'm a cannibal. Send help.

Autocorrect just changed 'meeting' to 'meating'. My boss is going to love this.

Autocorrect changed 'I'm coming' to 'I'm communist.' My boss is now very confused. #AutocorrectFails

GPS said 'turn left'. I turned left. Now I'm in a cow pasture. Send snacks.