My blood type is coffee. Don't talk to me before my third cup.

Ordered a gourmet burger. Got a sad patty in a box. My expectations vs reality.

Attempted gourmet pasta, ended up with burnt noodles and a smoke alarm concert. 🍝🔥

Tried to make a cake. Ended up with a delicious, yet structurally unsound, blob. 🎂💥

I tried to make a cake from scratch. It looks like a science experiment gone wrong.

My 'gourmet' dinner looks like a crime scene. Send help. And pizza.

Tried to make a soufflé. Ended up with a burnt pancake. Send help and fire extinguisher.