My dating app bio: 'Fluent in sarcasm & disappointment.' It's working too well.

My brain during seasonal depression: 'Is it fall or is it just my soul wilting?' 🍂💀

Bought it online, looked great. Arrived, looked like a potato sack. The internet is a liar.

My phone battery percentage is basically my social battery percentage. Both at 3% by noon.

Ordered a 'chic minimalist' lamp. Got a glorified glow stick. My aesthetic is now 'underwhelming'.

My WFH 'office' is just my bed with a laptop on my stomach. Productivity is a myth.

My boss's filter turned him into a potato for 10 mins. Best Zoom meeting ever. #WorkFromHome