Went to the gym, lifted my water bottle, and called it a day. Gains achieved.

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I've been staring at this for 5 minutes straight

Why does this describe my life so perfectly

This is the content I came here for

I feel personally attacked by this

This is the content I came here for

I need this framed on my wall

Me at the gym: 'I'm a fitness guru!' Also me: 'Is this machine for sitting?'

Leg day: where my will to live goes to die, then gets resurrected as pure soreness.

My team scores: 'WE ARE THE GREATEST DYNASTY EVER!' Opponent scores: 'RIGGED! FIRE EVERYONE!' #SportsFans

My team won. I'm getting a tattoo. My team lost. I'm burning my house down.

My team scores: 'WE ARE THE BEST EVER!' My team concedes: 'FIRE EVERYONE! THIS IS A DISGRACE!'

My team loses: 'Fire everyone! This is unacceptable!' My team wins: 'I knew it all along!'